soc-med

This page is under construction, subject to change.

Social media is stoking the road rage fires by connecting us with those who share our extreme views reducing us to silos of our own kind.  Then these smart phones separate us by just a glass from those we disagree with.  We’re building defensive perimeters testing phrases from people like us narrowing our common views.  Blocking out those we disagree with or settling on name calling against those who we find offensive or contrary to our beliefs is making us much worse communicators.  This can all be alleviated by face to face, or actual back and forth voice phone calls, or 2 way video calls.  Rarely does social media involve such alleviating methods.

A few good things come from social media but unless one practices moderation, addictive behavior sprouts up and over time peoples growth is stunted.  Even if someone never drinks alcohol, uses tobacco, or does drugs, but uses all their free time and then some time reserved for real responsibility to surf social media they become an addict with all the associated pitfalls.

I have personally observed extreme highs leading up to dating and while dating women which caused them to produce extreme texting of their naked body, tits, pussy, etc.  sex tapes were a suggestion by more than one woman and I was shocked and never did it.  I think the social media craze is being led right now by women.  These same women and I think women in general are letting themselves be swayed far more than they would be in person.  They want a mate, they want to be heard, they think their body speaks volumes and it does, but not in the way they want to be remembered.  Since everything ends eventually these women also practice extreme lows of self pity, and ultimately using their bodies again only this time having sex in such short amounts of time with new men it makes ones head spin.  I know for a fact women use sex as a weapon when fucking multiple men as I’ve often been contacted by the NEXT man after the woman dumps me.  He explains he fucked a woman on a sexual conquest mission!   Women can have sex whenever they want.  Not men!  Sex and shame are power tools women have perfected.

This picture sums up why social media is so dangerous.

Social media was especially dangerous when I’d found myself subconsciously attracted to a beautiful female addict for romance.  Often I find myself having just given my last resource (time, money or both), to an addict with no understanding of how much to value what they’d received from me.  I used to be a sober enabler.  I’d find addicts, never using alcohol or drugs myself, but then soaking up the addicts emotions.  Like riding a roller coaster.  Their ups were my ups and their depression I felt and strived to cheer us both up.  I enabled those (mostly romantic women, some platonic male friends).  Usually I was attracted to those who are rich and love to threaten with legal action against me after I expose them in a catch 22 caused by their blackout inebriation and memory loss of promises.  Giving away my power and sharing that I could no longer give more to the addict is when the addict strikes back, conveniently forgetting how they spent all my money.  Usually I find the addict laughing at me at this stage.  Finally I perceive my self imposed destruction.  I emphasize this as I’ve only met addicts online.  I also only met addicts through other alcoholic friends.  Surprise Surprise!  I think social media and social dating sites are shoved on addicts in therapy as ways to find romance.  Some dating apps are purely used by women to be modern day prostitutes.

Expanding on the road rage example, just a pane of glass separates us from another human being yet we feel insulted enough to become on fire, ready to fight a perfect stranger.  Yet if we pull over on the shoulder of the road, step out of our car, and see and hear the other persons non verbal communication (which is 13 times more powerful than 2D communication), most people instantly feel no ill will to the other human, no longer holding the grudge.  Fuckbook, Twitter, Instagram, other similar programs keep this single glass pane separation from those who infuriate us, never giving us the quieting effect of face to face, or voice phone or video calls.  I’ve met young adults today who don’t even know how to address a paper letter (where the TO field goes, and FROM goes, and Stamp), they’re so unpracticed with real communication.  Those people are experts on fuckbook.

Mediation, mindfulness, or studying emotions is ignored in social media.  Social media teaches us to be gambling addicts and rewards the fast button pushers.

Social media can have huge benefits though.  Single mothers finding others to help with short notice baby sitting and other similar social goods can’t be overemphasized as benefits of social media.  However most of the time people let their emotions drive them nuts on social media.  Isolation with just a smart phone screen is leading to depression.

The fact that anger, jealously, pride, envy, lust, etc drive this part of society (social media) so strongly can be best seen if overlaid to a public sidewalk.  Imagine that same yelling, mouth-frothing person on a public sidewalk acting that way.  They wouldn’t.  But they’re hiding behind their locked doors, isolated, empowered by therapy, prescription drugs, to feel safe enough to bully, rage, and name call, and overall be someone they wouldn’t be if watched by other humans.  Most wouldn’t keep up such shitty behavior because they’d feel exposed with eyes watching.  But they don’t feel exposed, in their homes, vehicles, behind a keyboard or voice dictating, without seeing the other human being and being seen by them.

The depth of this lack of health quickly makes people isolate more.  Less human when the key factor of instantaneous communication is tossed in.  I had pen pals in high school who lived in Europe.  I had to write paper letters and wait for responses.  This taught me how to communicate effectively.  Now, I see addicts with 500 plus facebook followers who tweet out therapy, but don’t embrace the therapy through hard life changes.  Instead just basking in the sun of others instantly gratifying them.  Most social media is as shallow as old time newspapers, old advertising, or other meaningless garbage.  Looking for meaning there won’t provide long term satisfaction very often.  It spreads out thin like mud in a swamp, continually covered over by the next layer of mud.

I’m writing a well thought out website, which only I can modify.  I’m like an old letter writer carefully choosing my words.  Unfortunately I think addiction to cell phones much like addiction to cigarettes years ago is a big fight yet to happen.  Verizon is raking in mega profits, posting unbelievable dividends to share holders, therefore share holders and the mighty Wall Street have an interest in keeping you addicted to that phone.  I’m in my late 30’s and I foresee being in my 60’s before the danger of smart phone addiction gets its due.

Combine the above scenario with the socioeconomic fact that mostly richer people, with disposable income, and razor wire fences, and large-paid-off homes, own the most fancy communication devices, and possess the most free time to vent, and the landscape I see is simply a playground for insanity.  A mine field with ever more mines being planted.  Insane as defined by Einstein (paraphrasing), is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result.  There are patterns to human behavior which engineers can’t ignore and I’ve sensed continuous patterns in social media, especially when it comes to dating women.

I’ve noticed a trend with the richest women I dated.  They all in some form or another sexted (sexy content texted), toward me, content I did not feel comfortable reciprocating.  Then later every woman who did that became nearly violent with me when I texted their digital content back to them for them to see.  If I can’t share back to someone, something they authored, originally, to me, I feel I found something worth avoiding ever again.  It’s been very relieving when I deleted all digital content from ex-girlfriends.  I doubt those women understand that once out on the internet, logs and backups exist besides those I ever can access for deletion.  This seems to be getting worse and I blame addiction to smart phones and advertisers using photoshop to make impossible female bodies appear everywhere.

What isn’t taught to us here is even more dangerous.  There are armies of brilliant social engineers with software writing backgrounds just trying to get you to stay on their application a little longer.  They make more money the longer you stay with their application.  Like old tobacco advertising, they need you to never question why you’re dying.  People are being manipulated by actual human beings this way and by artificial intelligence software written by experts, which does nothing more than share around what is “trending…” or being viewed the most.  Since bad news travels faster and farther than good news, social media is actually making us angrier and less able to communicate with our fellow human beings in an effective manner.

Rage can only increase under these above conditions.  The solution is actual voice phone calls, in person meetings, writing a letter by hand and mailing it, waiting for a response.  I strongly avoid all social media except when I have a specific purpose, akin to shopping at the grocery store.  I make a list, go in the store, purchase, and leave.  The internet is only an addiction when we simply surf into it, lose track of hours a day there and do it day after day.  I’ve now seen more than three women I’ve dated who use social media as a business, making money as a private investigator.  One woman actually got paid by other women to do deep background investigation work on potential male partners.  Background checks should be done by professionals, not drug addicts with hundreds of facebook followers.  I was at her house once when a woman came by and handed her cash for services rendered and it scared the FUCK out of me!  I literally would not have sex with this facebook private investigator she was so fucked in the head.  Other women out of the blue asked me if I used to date, “_______” so and so, and I felt my heart stop and almost shit myself.  “Yes…” I said trembling.  I dated that person from that city from around that time, I said, obviously shaken as it wasn’t what we were talking about.  Like being sucker-punched this kind of sneakiness is devestaing to any relationship and needs to be taught to everyone for fairness.  Can men do this?  Hell no!  Women use Fuckbook far more than men.  That woman never bothered to ask if that prior woman was similarly hostile to me.  She was!  I tried to call the police on her but her mob connections made the police file a hollow complaint against me.  I smell a network of deception and young men can easily be eaten alive if unaware of how rich women use social media.  I asked if they used FaceBook to figure that out, “Yes!” she said, with energy unlike I’d seen before.  As if that social media snooping was all that gave her satisfaction.  There are good parts to social media, but divorced dads, who are denied time with their kids, due to corruption in our legal system makes social media into a mine field.  More and more woman I meet can barely hold back asking me if I’m on Facebook.  Here’s my profile picture:

Yes, I’m on facebook to lock down my account with two factor authentication.  I am not on social media to be hunted like food, by dangerous, vampirous women.

I have social media accounts on most major platforms but rarely is there a picture of me.  I tweet mostly, and listen mostly to tweets from the few trusted people and entities I know are trustworthy online.  There aren’t many though.  I think I have as many twitter followers as friends on facebook and don’t want more.  I tweet a bit mostly about the dangers of inaction over climate change, mass illegal surveillance, and other dangers to national security.  Also science, because, fuck bullshit.

Addiction problems used to appeal to me subconsciously because my brain injured mother acted in every way like an addict.  My recovery began when I walked away from addicts never looking back.  All things in moderation said the ancient Greeks.  You could kill yourself by eating too much peanut butter, my grandpa told me once.  Nothing about an addict on social media, taking prescription drugs, drinking alcohol, doing illegal drugs, smoking cigarettes, being impulsive, maybe gambling or having sex with strangers, shows moderation.  Yet, I likely described many men and women on social media just there… Rarely is moderation, wisdom, and self control every brought to the top and shared; Instead the lowest limbic system impulses are put pedestals and worshipped to all our detriment.

We need complex conversations.  We aren’t going to solve difficult societal and social questions unless we talk to those people we disagree with.  We have to pick up the phone.  We have to meet and see peoples faces.  I took hydrology in college which covered a text book example of DDT poisoning  which killed fly fisherman on a pond near San Fransisco many years back.  In bringing this up with a religious-republican-anti-socialist, asshole, and however else this person self identifies I got that typical boiler plate growling response.  Born out of siloing and naivety from social media.  It sounded as absurd then as now and went something like, “I don’t believe in bioaccumulation or any of that stuff…”  As they stormed away red faced I wanted to say, “What about Lead (Pb), poisoning?”  But thought better of it and just stored away the fact they couldn’t share reasonable conversation in the future.

This video encompasses both siloing (or hiding with people like you behind walls).  And also talks about another aspect of people who are unethical and rewarded for being so.  Our phones and online addictions are making us worse communicators.