worst

The worst, or the absurd.

With as few gender labels or their relation to me here’s the most absurd of the absurd.  Growing up poor as shit with a brain injured mom who loved addicts dragged me into life threatening places over and over long before I could even legally vote. In no particular order here’s how absurd a life built around addicts can be.

Working along side my mother in middle school, I used to clean mansion houses with the homeowners cleaning supplies just to have money for bills.

I’ve climbed into boilers to scrape and clean them at industrial facilities.  IN FUCKING MIDDLE SCHOOL!

I’ve lived in neighborhoods of California where the nearest white person besides my mom was miles away.  I was almost killed for being white in black neighborhoods, only surviving by having been a long distance runner.  I was in high school.

I’ve attended hundreds of church “marry or bury” events and have always been numb to marriage and death.  I feel more emotion grocery shopping than surrounded by mourners.  My mom got an award from hospice for playing piano at her 1,000th hospice, years ago!

I fought vengefully the whole day I was married.  The only time I was married had only one county clerk witness who I’m sure was as uncomfortable as I was.  I SHOULD NEVER HAVE MARRIED THAT WOMAN!

My wife suggested we go to a counselor, and after only half the session, I watched in horror as my then wife stood up cussing and walked out, walking to my house.  I was so scared I slept in my truck in the back yard from then on.

I’ve watched in horror as both my mother and my ex wife often invite homeless people who just walked by my house into my house, putting myself, my possessions and sometimes my child in danger.  Telling these women how dangerous this was made them yell at me, calling me the problem…